OK, so if one is dealing with a BPD spouse, it seems like the advice is to not argue or defend during the spouse’s flare up. However, the non shouldn’t be a doormat. The scenarios presented always speak to the no win dynamic. Resistance is futile. heh.
[yeah, yeah, codependent, enabling, he’s in therapy now, all that…I know…]
Given all of that, how is someone like me who has been seriously wounded by the nasty things H might say and not take them personally? How can that possibly be healthy for me? Do I have it wrong here?
P.S. – Processing a lot of serious things and have been incommunicado and buried with end of semester yuck. It’s been helpful to focus on work though. I am low on ability to interact but I had to raise my head to get feedback. I can’t wrap my head around this. I’ve been keeping myself out of the toxic house as much as possible and I am better. Now I need to know what not to do.