I have been AFK for a few days and I’m going to stay that way. Overall, I’m much better. Heavy grief. Grief that I have to simply allow and work through. Grieving fights off flashbacks (ah ha!) Once I understood that, I allowed the grief to come in floods. The meds are kicking in and the aeon feeling nothing is passing.
This means I am feeling everything. All at once. All of it. Full on.
I need to keep things to a manageable level and make sure I’m not unwittingly making things worse by acting as if I were a bull in a china shop. I need solitude and mental white space. This is my last chance. And I’m gonna take it.