…but it’s OK. It’s where I am supposed to be right now. Last night I had some very bad flashbacks. My house is not my house and hasn’t been for awhile. I can either take it back or abandon it. For right now, I just need to feel. That’s enough.
I used to listen to the greatest hits album over and over when I was a kid. “I am a Rock” (http://youtu.be/JKlSVNxLB-A) represents the necessary counterdependence and invisibility that was necessary for survival. Little by little I’m peeling that away. It hurts like hell but I’m not stopping. It’s just part of my process.