My undergraduate degree is in conflict theory and resolution and have advanced mediation training. I wrote a thesis on the transferability of the skills of alternate dispute resolution training to non-ADR jobs. The only reason I didn’t go hard at mediation when I finished all of this about 8-9 years ago was because the only demand was in the family court systems. I knew with my history with Greg’s ex and his kids, as well as the turmoil I endured [and tried to save him from…that’s another story], it would render me unable to feel that I could be entirely objective.
Disclaimer: this does not make me an expert in solving my own conflicts. It’s far easier to solve others’ conflicts because the mediator owns the process not the problem. In fact, I may be blind to some very basic things because of emotion (i.e., subjectivity). However, my training and education does provide me with tools toward rational thinking. Once I calm down, I know they’re there. I have studied every model, theory, approach, you name it, with regard to individual and group communication and conflict. I teach this stuff within the larger scope of my discipline. I use it when I consult.
Unfortunately, it doesn’t help me when I get the deer in headlights thing going on.
BTW, I told Greg last night I’m not doing that anymore after he made fun of my jumpiness. Dude, that was damn low. And this wasn’t the episode that I can’t remember from the previous post either. It must have been really bad because I am totally blocked.
So there you have it.