I came across this PDF of boundaries from The Virtues Project.
I have a problem with the be positive thing when I’m in the middle of crisis. Since I consider this to be a first draft, I will afford myself the same grace as I do my students when they are attempting to learn something new. The language and form will not be perfect. So what. It’s a start.
- You can express your anger without being emotionally and/or verbally abusive.
- You cannot humiliate me and attack me.
- I will not absorb attempts to hurt me by trashing my mothering skills or allow you to use my children against me in any way.
- I will not allow you to debase me when we are working in a professional capacity because you are mad at me on a personal level. I wouldn’t let any other colleague get away with this and I will not let you either.
General concepts, no “if/then” statements but I feel like I need them. In other words, if he becomes vicious and nasty and I have said [above] I will not tolerate this behavior, what will I do then? Disintegrate into the usual puddle and sob? Yeah, that’s worked out sooooo well…
Nonetheless, I at least have a start. Thoughts?